Aside

Why must being married mean the end of freedom?

A coworker of mine went to a concert last night. He had fun, until he came home to his wife. Apparently his wife hen-pecks him to death every time he participates in a fun activity that doesn’t include her. It’s funny, because at the same time I was gaming online with a good friend of mine who was currently on a business trip, and his wife proceeds to call him no less than 4 times in the space of an hour while we’re gaming. I spend more time twiddling my thumbs waiting for him to finally get off the phone than I did actually playing SWTOR (Star Wars: The Old Republic.)

Why did I want to get married again? I forget.

,

45 Responses to Why must being married mean the end of freedom?

  1. Lisa in Vermont June 13, 2013 at 12:30 AM #

    I actually have to encourage my husband to take time for himself. It’s so important for men to just spend time hanging out with other guys and relaxing.

    My husband doesn’t do it often enough. Last weekend he spent a day helping a neighbor and some other guys from our church build a shed and he ended up have a good time. Plus, he learned some construction skills he can use to fix a few things that need fixing around our house.

    Of course if he was spending hours each night playing video games while ignoring our family, that would be a different story. But, I honestly don’t know of any husband who do that.

    In the winter he skis every single Saturday (we live about 20 minutes from a one of the nicest ski areas in Vermont). Sometimes he takes one or a few of our kids. Sometimes he goes alone or meets a friend. He always comes back so relaxed and happy.

    I don’t mind at all, especially since he lets me go for a daily run or workout, which I prefer over a ladies night out.

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 1:18 AM #

      Of course if he was spending hours each night playing video games while ignoring our family, that would be a different story. But, I honestly don’t know of any husband who do that.

      The irony is that I don’t even like to game all that much, and would choose pleasant conversation with a girl over gaming most any day. Human interaction with someone I deeply care about is what I usually crave the most.

  2. crimsonviceroy June 13, 2013 at 10:53 AM #

    One’s sense of peace must be considered into the calculation when considering marriage. The problem with many women is that they think they know what men like to do and impose that upon whoever they happen to be with at the time. I mean, when I was still living with my parents during my high school years, I couldn’t tell you how many times she nagged to get me to do something, most of the time it was for very trivial and unncessary things, not actual chores, but more-so just time-wasting activities. I could only imagine what it would be like with a wife doing that all the time. With mom’s all you got was grounding and allowances being withheld, but with wives, it can literally destroy your life with the complicit help from the government. Yeah, that may sound like conspiracy theory, but ask that to men like Vladek Filler and Thomas James Ball.

    Lisa, that’s nice that you “let” your husband go on those ski trips and those construction jobs. He must feel so fulfilled that his wife lets him have his personal time. Do you also make sure that he gets a chance to enjoy some junk food now and then in order to wet his appetite for gourmet food? Perchance you might also let him purchase his own “toys” too. How patronizing.

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 12:34 PM #

      Lisa, that’s nice that you “let” your husband go on those ski trips and those construction jobs.

      That’s not what she said, CV. Lisa is one of the good eggs, so let’s cut her a break shall we? (especially after the silly verbal beatdowns she’s been getting at SSM’s place over a BBQ grill)

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 1:41 PM #

      Has nothing to do with the wife thing. When you have KIDS, your personal time goes out the window and must be scheduled (both parents’ time).

      You want a family, you have to grow up and own that you don’t get to run off and do whatever you want whenever you feel like it. In fact, when you have very young children, you don’t even get to go to the bathroom when you feel like it. So don’t make this about the wife being a nagging twit.

    • Frank June 13, 2013 at 1:50 PM #

      This wasn’t about kids though, but about wives monopolizing and hen-pecking men in the absence of any valid reason. My coworker made time to go to a concert for one night while his kid was sleeping, yet his wife goes bat wagons. My friend was on a business trip and his wife is calling him late at night for no other reason than just to snap at him.

      This is more about the insecurity of these women than anything else. Spend a little time on your own and they get all panicky.

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 2:01 PM #

      I should clarify I was talking to the above poster who was ripping into the poor lady who “lets” her husband go on ski trips.

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 2:05 PM #

      Ah, got it, LOL

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 2:08 PM #

      Yeah, that’s an interesting point to bring up, though. There are a lot of marriages which operate well on a traditional model (mom stays home with the kids, dad works)–but it does end up that even though dad’s job is technically bringing home the bacon, divisions of personal time become a lot more tricky. Even the most traditional of fathers usually realizes it’s important to spend time with his children, and therefore finds his personal time compromised pretty severely (that’s even with Mom doing all the childcare).

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 2:18 PM #

      I know kids are a HUGE timesink, which is why I’m constantly on my friend’s buttwagons for daring to allot more time for his family than he does for me. HOW DARE HE. When is he going to realize it’s all about me? :-D

      But seriously, what bothers me is the inequitable treatment when it comes to personal free time he does have to spare. His wife for example, has her own share of personal time that she spends on occasion with friends or relatives of hers, and he takes care of the kids in her absence. He never has a problem with this. But spend a couple of hours gaming on the weekend, with the kids tucked in bed and his wife flips her wig. I think it’s largely a personality thing and a failure to understand how introverts recharge and operate.

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 2:50 PM #

      Sounds irritating. Would she be as rude if he were, say, reading a book for a couple hours instead?

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 3:11 PM #

      It would be if he were reading a book at Starbucks instead of at home where the wife can see him. ;-)

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 9:52 PM #

      My downtime consists of a LOT of reading, and online surfing, both of which aren’t conducive to “couple time.” I’m not really fond of TV shows or movies, which you can watch with someone–I’m more about the solitary unwind. So yeah, I’d have an issue if my spouse were on my back about this.

  3. crimsonviceroy June 13, 2013 at 3:08 PM #

    First off, children were not even mentioned in the post. It was strictly in the context of the fact that he was being harassed for trivial and ignorant matters that had NOTHING to do with the children or the support of the family. I have to agree with Frank on his assertion that if wives have such a need to hen-peck their husbands because a moment’s worth of peace and relaxation is considered falling down on the job and being irresponsible since “children are in the picture” then you have your own insecurities to work out. Don’t make it our bloody problem.

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 9:22 PM #

      You’re the one who jumped all over “Lisa,” so I pointed out that she is part of a couple which by her words has children–which means AS A PAIR OF GROWN-UPS in charge of a family, you don’t “let” each other do things in a patronizing way as you suggest. The children are both your bloody problem, unless you’re a jackass who cares more about himself than his own kids, and you both have to work it out on how to have personal time. .

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 9:49 PM #

      Also, the title of this post is, “why must being married be the end of freedom.” I’m not slamming Frank for that title, but–it is the end of freedom. When you commit to another person, you automatically take on the responsibility of having to account for your actions. Now, don’t get me wrong. I think a guy should be able to play games and go out with friends (and vice versa). But you do have to account for where you are. Because someone cares where you are and what you’re doing. When you’re single, nobody cares where you are and what you’re doing. Most people get sick of nobody caring so they get married. Adulthood 101.

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 9:54 PM #

      That’s still not really the end of freedom though, more accurately it would be the end of UNBRIDLED freedom. :-D

      Both husband and wife should still be free to pursue their favorite pastimes as time allots.

    • wkhg June 13, 2013 at 10:09 PM #

      True, there is a school of thought though that with the very limited time one has (as a spouse, parent, and presumably professional), pursuits that take up a lot of personal time away from family are not in the best interest of the marriage.

    • Frank Swift June 13, 2013 at 10:44 PM #

      Yeah, I’m thinking extended solo road trips across Europe spanning several weeks or months probably isn’t the ideal way to spend personal time alone when you have a family.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 12:10 AM #

      Oh snap Frank. Weekends become pretty precious when you are working 50-plus hr weeks.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 12:21 AM #

      It’s OK though–I get it :) You want a gal who can bounce her jugglies and a baby on her hip while also whipping up a mean cherry icebox pie and providing witty repartee and not being a beotch. They exist, I promise! For real. I can’t cook for nothin’ but I know lots who can and do all that. It’s out there. Stay strong.

    • Frank Swift June 14, 2013 at 1:13 PM #

      And they’re all in California right? ;-)

  4. crimsonviceroy June 14, 2013 at 1:42 PM #

    Working 50+ hours a week are not simply relegated to married men, so you can throw that argument out the window. The economy has left employers with the leverage to demand more hours out of ALL of their employees because it is an employer’s market. No where is anyone contesting that being married will not result in loss of personal time. No joke, thanks for that useless tidbit of advice.

    The point being communicated is not of the importance of free time or the lack thereof in a committed relationship, as you so very much like to hold onto as the backbone of your rant. The point Frank was making was of a weary disposition of having to deal with an overly legalistic spouse who deems some activities unworthy and a waste of time outside of the context of the responsibilities of home, hearth, and children. Nowhere in his argument was it discussed that the husband was falling down on the job or abusing the personal down time to neglect his family. I’m giving Frank the credit that he knows these men a lot better than you do. After all the preparation and maturing that Frank has done and cataloged in his blog, he’s not dumb enough to think that there is an abundance of free time in a committed relationship. To suggest that he is is doing him a severe disservice and a rather patronizing insult.

    “unless you’re a jackass who cares more about himself than his own kids”

    Ah yes, let’s lower ourselves down to infantile name-calling and personal insults to get our points across. Real classy.

    “They exist, I promise! For real. I can’t cook for nothin’ but I know lots who can and do all that. It’s out there.”

    So now we have to rely on the anecdotal accounts of a total stranger online to give us insight on the feasibility of finding a mate? Would be no different than me saying that I know a few friends who struck it rich in Vegas, doesn’t mean I’m going to go about quitting my day job since their anecdotal accounts validate the success of me making it big in Vegas. Frank, that 450,000 statistic is as real as it gets, not meaning to detract from the original post here.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 2:57 PM #

      For the billionth time, my friend–I get Frank’s point. I was responding to your unwarranted attack on Lisa.

      And, if you think the chances of finding a mate is on par with making it big in Vegas, you have the problem here. Most people get married at some point in their lives.

  5. crimsonviceroy June 14, 2013 at 3:12 PM #

    Yeah and about 50% get divorced, what’s YOUR point?

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 3:50 PM #

      The point there is that finding a mate seems to be something most people manage to do.

      Now, *maintaining a marriage* is a separate thing altogether.

  6. crimsonviceroy June 14, 2013 at 3:12 PM #

    You’d be the fool if you believe that I would be in any sort of friendship with the likes of you.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 3:48 PM #

      Lighten up, dude. For your own sake.

  7. crimsonviceroy June 14, 2013 at 4:32 PM #

    Ah yes, as signs of a classic Feminist..boy I missed my skirmishes with you guys. I was starting to get rusty without a good challenge..not that you could really supply one with your incessant rants.

    1. “And, if you think the chances of finding a mate is on par with making it big in Vegas, you have the problem here.” A classic example of Feminist Shaming Tactic #11 – Charge of Instability (Code White) – The White Padded Room Charge, whereby the accused is charged with social dysfunction or mental instability in order to discredit any validity in the accused’s arguments. Matter of fact, this could also be a blend with Tactic #16 – Charge of Withheld Affection (Code Pink) – The Pink Whip Charge, whereby the accused is admonished that his viewpoints or behavior will cause women to reject him as a mate.

    2. “Lighten up, dude. For your own sake.” Wonderful example of Tactic #10 – Charge of Irascibility (Code Red) – You’re Being Meeeaaannnn – The target is accused of having anger management issues. Whatever negative emotions he has are assumed to be unjustifiable, and therefore his arguments are rendered irrelevant to the topic at hand. All argument aside on this comment, I sincerely doubt you have any shred of altruism based off of your previous arguments on this post. So let’s not play the “I’m only looking out for you” card, that’s an old trick too. Where’s your A-game?

    Wow, got any more gems or nuggets of wisdom or are your running dry? As for your rather weak argument about how most everyone manages to get married, so does this mean that by your admission about how “I have the problem here” because I am merely stating the very real odds of finding someone who is serious about a LIFE-long commitment, that since Frank can’t seem to find someone when the vast majority can, that he has some kind of problem too? Are you inferring that since the vast majority can find themselves someone to marry, that those who find themselves still single have some kind of “problem”? Cause from where I’m standing, he’s been standing at the altar waiting for his bride to show up, while dust starts collecting on his tuxedo. He’s been ready and been prepared and has his stuff in order. Perhaps the other party is just not able to meet him even half way…but we must never mention this because that would be too “meeeeaaaannn”. You just keep digging a bigger and bigger pit for yourself with these asinine rants.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 5:21 PM #

      First of all, you are very fond of the word “rant.” It appears that you are the one ranting, if you will.

      Second, I never said you were being mean (or “meeeeeaaannn”). You are unpleasant, which is a totally different animal.

      Third, yes, Frank has a problem. He wants to get married and can’t find the right girl, so he has pretty much started a whole blog about it, I’d say that’s a problem.

      Fourth, finding someone to marry who is serious about a life-long commitment is not as hard as you seem to think. There are plenty of people out there who are, and I am sure think they are completely prepared to go the long haul. But as I said, once you get into a marriage, maintaining it is a totally different thing and it can be quite difficult. I have been married for 10 years.

      Fifth, I’m flattered you think I’m such a raging feminist. I took my husband’s last name and quit my job to stay home with our daughter. What on earth would Sheryl Sandberg say?

      Repeat, lighten up. I’m not worth this rage.

    • Frank Swift June 14, 2013 at 5:29 PM #

      Third, yes, Frank has a problem. He wants to get married and can’t find the right girl, so he has pretty much started a whole blog about it, I’d say that’s a problem.

      Actually my blog is about an eclectic range of topics about whatever interests me. My recent posts has been more about dating and marriage, but my next few posts will be about dogs, Christianity, and places I’m planning to visit for the summer. I wonder if GOMI will feature me again on how my standards for dog ownership are too absurdly high? :-D

  8. crimsonviceroy June 14, 2013 at 5:59 PM #

    ” I’m not worth this rage.” Who’s angry, I’m rather enjoying this repartee. And you’re worth considerably less than that, dearest. If quitting your job and staying home makes you immune to accusations against your gynocentric tendencies and their core alignments with feminism, you’ve got another thing coming. It’s hilarious how many Churchian’s and Christian conservative feminists like to say how they aren’t like those “other” feminists just cause they happen to do a few things differently.

    ” I have been married for 10 years.” Well now, aren’t we special, I suppose a nomination for the Congressional Medal of Honor would be enough of an accolade to meet such a noble and esteemed accomplishment-sarcasm off. No one honestly cares, that’s your business. Being married for 10 years doesn’t necessarily make you the authority on marriage and relationships, Dr. Phil.

    As Frank has highlighted, this blog is more than just what you think is him complaining about not finding a woman. If you actually read through his blog instead of blowing hot air up his tail pipe with your dime-store psychology, you might have thought twice before laying into him as having some kind of problem. But a proud housewife such as yourself can’t help but mother Frank around as if he was some kind of pre-adolescent child who didn’t understand the subtleties of marriage.

    “Repeat, lighten up” Repeat Tactic #10 – Charge of Irascibility. Clearly creativity and original thought is a lost cause on you.

    ————

    Frank-classy rebuttal. They might even have Scooby-Doo do a special pscyh evaluation on how your standards are too high? Don’t forget your Scooby Snacks.

    • Frank Swift June 14, 2013 at 7:11 PM #

      I’m not worth this rage.” Who’s angry, I’m rather enjoying this repartee. And you’re worth considerably less than that, dearest.

      Yeah, I’m sure obnoxious snark like that will win you a lot of converts.

      If quitting your job and staying home makes you immune to accusations against your gynocentric tendencies and their core alignments with feminism, you’ve got another thing coming.

      You are making a lot of assumptions about a person you really don’t know from Adam and reading WAY too much into her comments. She never said that she wasn’t a feminist either, only that she’s not a RAGING feminist.

      ” I have been married for 10 years.” Well now, aren’t we special, I suppose a nomination for the Congressional Medal of Honor would be enough of an accolade to meet such a noble and esteemed accomplishment-sarcasm off. No one honestly cares, that’s your business.

      I would say her marriage of 10 years carries slightly more weight than either of us who has never married or built a successful relationship, doncha think?

      “Repeat, lighten up” Repeat Tactic #10 – Charge of Irascibility. Clearly creativity and original thought is a lost cause on you.

      Allow me to make the same charge: LIGHTEN UP.

      Maybe it’s me, but if someone comes to my blog and shows a clear willingness to open a friendly dialogue despite a difference of opinions, they deserve to be treated with a certain level of decorum.

      You may claim not to be angry, but these comments of yours sure come across as inappropriate rage-fests that would have been better suited if they were directed at some of the bomb throwing trolls who crossed all kinds of lines when attacking me, the worst of which was to attack my Stetson. FAIL

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 7:35 PM #

      I’m a little baffled at the rage here, myself. But kind of flattered by it as well! I must be worth something :)

      BTW, just as a disclaimer, I’m not bragging about my 10-year-marriage. I’ll save bragging rights for when we reach 50 years, like my parents. My intended implication was that I have been in a marriage for a decent amount of time and therefore have some insight on the difficulties of maintaining the institution.

      PS: Sorry, Frank. I realize you write about other things. I guess I was focusing on your relationship posts. I like dogs, btw, but if you like big dogs you won’t like the breed I suggest. We have two miniature poodles and they are surprisingly non-wimpy little guys. Very smart, companionable, and they don’t shed or make a mess.

    • Frank Swift June 14, 2013 at 7:40 PM #

      Oh dear God, not poodles. ANYTHING BUT POODLES.

      I say this being a former poodle owner myself, but to be fair the two I used to have way back when were of very poor temperament and rescued from a shelter, so not likely purebreds. The last one almost tore my father’s hand off before he finally had to be put down.

      If I had to go with a smaller dog though, I’d say Norwich Terriers all the way. I love those little guys.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 7:49 PM #

      Also, to be dead honest, you can’t understand the subtleties of marriage until you are married. That’s not a condescending remark. It’s the truth. That’s why a lot of people end up getting divorced, even if they had the purest of intentions. It’s not like it’s some arcane secret society, but a lot of situations arise in marriage that are kind of hard to fathom when one isn’t married.

    • wkhg June 14, 2013 at 7:52 PM #

      One of our poodles is a rescue! He’s the coolest. The other one is a pet shop reject. I didn’t want poodles myself. My husband was the one who talked me into them because he had poodles growing up. I love anything terrier, too. So cute. I don’t care if they are yappy. I’m kind of yappy myself ;)

    • Frank Swift June 15, 2013 at 11:24 AM #

      LOL, I remember when I was visiting a dog friendly hotel in Lake Placid (awesome place BTW), one of the guests came out with a terrier, who appeared as if he was barking his brains out, but he wasn’t making a sound. I commented that it was the quietest bark I ever hard, and the lady said the dog had surgery to remove the vocal chords so it could yap as much as it wanted without bothering anyone. I was like O_O But I guess that was the only way for her to take it on trips without dealing with the grief of complaints about the yappings.

      I don’t think I could do that to teh poor doggeh, and would do as much training as necessary to teach it not to bark/yap rather than screw with its voice box like that. Yikes.

    • wkhg June 15, 2013 at 9:20 PM #

      Yeah, one of my parents’ neighbors did that to their dog. I get both sides. Part of me feels bad for the dog but the other part is like, does he really KNOW? And it does make it easier on the neighbors.

      I mean, we neuter them. We do all sorts of things to them! I love dogs because they are so adaptable and cheerful.

    • Frank Swift June 17, 2013 at 12:34 PM #

      I would say as long as other avenues were tried to no avail then if that’s what needs to be done, it’s better than putting the dog down (which is usually the only two choices left when dealing with incessant barking that can’t be trained to stop)

  9. Ashli June 22, 2013 at 2:26 AM #

    Wow. Just wow. I read the entire post and comments one right after the other. It;s bizarre how all the confusion and anger turned to a sweet discussion about pups and then their demise. *eep* This reply is to the post and comments that followed.

    I have been married for almost nine years. I completely agree with wkhg’s comments that it’s hard to understand the complexity of marriage until you’ve actually been married for a while. Some people never figure it out and get divorced.

    Also, relationships, especially as complex as marriage, evolve over time. Therefore, perspectives and interactions change. I don’t even know if I’m making sense right now. It’s been a few very LONG work weeks. What I experienced and felt during my first few years of marriage have changed so much compared to how I see my marriage now.

    I think the longer I stay married to my husband, the more committed I become and the more I genuinely love and appreciate him as a friend, protector, companion, lover, provider, etc. As experiences have tested our relationship and commitment to each other, depending on how we handle and move on from things, the better things can get.

    I can see why people get divorced. Marriage is not simple. It completely changes your life, focus, independence, freedom, autonomy, priorities, and more, The longer you’re married, the more of this is required. Or maybe that’s just my experience. I’m not saying these things in a negative way. Being married to my husband, choosing to commit to him for better or worse (and no matter how perfect your mate, worse will come at some point… and more than once), has made me appreciate him, myself, and our relationship more. It’s not always hard; fun happens! But it’s not always easy; life happens.

    Now I know I’m off-topic from your post, so I’ll try to bring it back in.

    My husband and I spend all of our off-work hours together, with the exception of me running errands. It’s our routine. It’s comfortable. It’s secure. We’re not always interacting with each other, but we’re often just an arm’s length away or at least within the same area of the house (we have a small house.. that could be a whole different post about small living spaces and relationships… another day). I enjoy that. After work, I’m usually doing house chores or cooking or doing dishes; he’s often dozing off to a baseball game while letting himself sit in null-sec on Eve.

    A few times in our marriage, he was gone for extended weeks of time. I HATED those times. I’ll lay it all out there. I would call him in the evenings just to hear his voice. I know that sounds corny, but I don’t care. Hearing his voice made me feel safe; talking to him before I tried to sleep was a must. I wanted to share stories of the day with him. That’s our routine, and it made me feel as normal as possible during an abnormal period of time. I hope he felt the same way about my phone calls.

    I wanted to make sure he was alive and well. My husband doesn’t always see his health as a priority. As his partner, I have the obligation and desire to see that he lives a long, healthy life. I call to check on him because I care about him.

    It was hard enough to be away from each other. Not for sugary-sappy reasons, but because we are such an integral part of each others’ lives after so many years. Even if we’re just in the same room, we still get something from each other. It’s nice that we have some similar hobbies and tastes so that we can share those experiences with each other.

    Having said all of that, I will also admit that I did call him because I was insecure in a lot of ways. I didn’t feel safe without him at night. It’s weird because I lived alone for several years, but it’s easy and wonderful getting used to sleeping with a man in the house. I also felt insecure about myself. My husband is quite easy on the eyes. I’m not stupid. I found him very attractive, enough to want to make sweet, sweet love to him forever. Of course, many other women would as well. I was insecure about myself; nobody’s perfect, and there’s a steep learning curve once your say, “I do” and actually mean it. So you’re right. Women are insecure, so we call our husbands. I think this is a fairly natural thing for women to feel. I could be wrong on that.

    Now why she would pick a fight or whatever, I have no idea. I choose not to fight with my husband. It happens on rare occasions. I find most things that could turn in to fights end up being of little consequence and useless. I think I tried nagging my husband for a week. That was an epic fail. I always end up being happier and more satisfied with my situation when I’m kind-hearted. I can’t remember ever calling him to nag or fight or nagging him the second he walked in the door.

    Anyway, my rant and eyes are coming to a close. I guess to sum up what I’m saying:

    You’re right. When you get married, your wife will call you when you’re away. It will most likely be to make sure you’re alive and well and because she’s insecure. Just make sure you choose one that will be sweet to you rather than rip you up. That is NOT normal, at least in my experience. I would say choose wisely and your concern won’t be an issue.

    By the way, we have three dogs. Two mini-schnauzers – husband’s choice. One poodle-terrier mix pound puppy – my inability to say no.

    Wow. I should’ve been asleep two hours ago. I hope that all made sense. LOL. Oh man. I just went back and read your post. The mind’s wandering stream of consciousness is strange indeed!

    • Frank Swift June 22, 2013 at 2:15 PM #

      Ashli, thanks for your comments!

      I tend to hear to opposing opinions on when someone should get married. If they get married young, there’s the risk of immaturity and not really understanding what you’re getting into, but it allows for people to grow together as a couple and if it endures many trials it tends to grow stronger and better than in the beginning. Then there’s getting married when you’re much older and set in your ways, which seems to be my scenario. I’m too used to doing things my way and living a largely autonomous lifestyle. I’ve been doing it for so many years that I wonder if I’d ever be able to adapt to a marriage, or would I come to resent the burdens and responsibilities it entails instead. Food for thought. O_O

      I have an affinity for a larger dog (though not Great Dane large), something more German Shepherd size. I think my favorite looking dogs are the cross mix between a Siberian Husky and Golden Retriever. If the temperament is right that could be the best dog ever… except for the shedding. >.<

  10. an observer July 9, 2013 at 8:46 PM #

    It is the womans job to accommodate her husband and submit to his leadership. As such, being older should be much less a problem for a man than a woman.

    With feminism encouraging moxie, girlpower and so on, it is making women less marriageable. But of course, fish dont need bicycles, do they?

  11. jack July 22, 2013 at 6:40 PM #

    When I see how rude, selfish, ad childish many women are, especially when addressing men on the internet, it confirms my conviction to only co-habitate rather than give some woman access to my wealth through the law.

    Never know when a nice girl will lose it.

    I think that a lot of ugly fat feminist women get on the internet and snark on manosphere blogs, because on the internet no one knows you’re a dog, figuratively or literally.

    There is nothing funnier to me than the heart-cry wailing of some tubby little twit, bashing away on the keyboard while the other shovels Oreos into their mouth.

    We gotta learn to forgive the fatties their rants, though. It’s all they got left.

    • Andrew November 2, 2015 at 5:35 PM #

      Jack’s a sad little man. So very alone and broken. Poor guy.

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